Feb
06

How do I get someone to change?

IF you are not in touch with the feelings and needs of the one that you wish would change, then I would URGE you to focus there. This applies to personal and professional relationships. Adults and children. I’m not just speaking of an intellectual understanding though … Connection at this deeper level to underlying feelings […]

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Feb
01

Annoyed, instead of feeling loving toward your person?

“I’m more often annoyed rather than [loving] with my Love, help please” Annoyance is essentially anger. It’s on the anger spectrum, kind of in the middle, with irritability at one end and rage at the other. I love that you are acknowledging your annoyance. Personal responsibility precedes growth. To be annoyed with someone you have […]

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Feb
01

What to Focus on Next

“How can I know what to focus on next in my personal development?” The place I go with this question is to speak to the part of you, who wants to improve or develop. *What do you hope to gain? *What is it you truly want out of undertaking personal improvement? What is motivating you […]

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Jan
04

Have a goal or a wish?

It’s that time of year hey? There are lots of messages out there about setting goals and New Years resolutions. Truth is we have intentions that we operate by regardless of the date. Right? Mostly these are unconscious, keeping us in a trance. Yes, intentions in the form of our thoughts come largely uninvited and […]

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Nov
26

At Your Upper Limit?

Have you ever had an intensely beautiful time, followed by a really challenging time – either in relationship with someone else, or in relationship to work, money, yourself, your health? I have. And wondered wtf (technical term!) for a mixture of confusion, upset, disappointment and/ or maybe annoyance… basically you found yourself probably needing empathy […]

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Nov
13

Same and different in relationships: what counts?

SO much conflict can occur when we want our partner to be like us. To think like us, to express themselves or behave in ways that fit inside our envelope of comfort. Yet it’s usually the differences which attract us at the outset. That they are more outgoing than us. Or they are quieter and […]

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Nov
01

Honesty and intimacy ..

One in ten interactions in a marriage is not honest. White lies or deliberately omitting information and not admitting mistakes – is being less than honest. The criterion for a person being honest with you, is that they practice “no deceptions, lead no life apart from you, and do not lie to you.” (The Science […]

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Oct
31

THE #1 Relationship factor

So here’s the guts of it … Research shows that men typically want less conflict and more s*x and women typically want more trustworthiness .. (plenty of ..emotional connection and being tuned in to eg. ‘he’s there for me, he understands me, listens to me, is who he says he is, does what he says he’ll do’) … not […]

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Oct
08

You can’t ‘nice’ someone into being ‘nice’ to you.

You can’t ‘nice’ someone into being ‘nice’ to you. It might seem like if you be loving and empathetic towards this other who is irritable, angry, critical that they will suddenly stop and think “wow how kind and loving is this person, I’m going to give them the same empathy and care back”. WE TEACH […]

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Oct
02

The ‘label’ SINGLE…

I have been inviting women who are not in relationship to join me for a very special retreat. I’ve been surprised and saddened about just how many women feel embarrassed or ashamed of the ‘label’ SINGLE. Our society gives many messages and too easily we take them on, that not being in an intimate relationship […]

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