Got a north star?
Most mornings after I drop my daughter to her bus stop, I walk to a beach that has no road access. Usually I am the only one there. Truly! 5 minutes from my home in a built up area of Sydney, and yet there I am, the whole beach to myself, the ocean sparkling, sand smooth, barely disturbed by another human being. Solitude. Why is no-one else there? Well to get to and from the beach I walk down and back up a VERY steep hill. Even the dog is crawling up the hill to the car.
I go because the experience never fails to soothe, enliven and uplift my spirit and clear my mind. My attention is firmly on this END RESULT when I face THE hill. I used to look at this beach and pass by – looking for easier access. Even if that meant sharing with others. Not now. When my legs ache or my breath runs short, as happens some days, it doesn’t matter. I know what I am creating and what I am going to enjoy, is much more special than these minor hiccups. In fact it’s been very good for my fitness and that is another reason why I choose this beach – it contributes to my vision of health.
We all need a WHY. Our relationships need a why, a vision. Something compelling and fulfilling, so significant to you that it will call forward the best in you. Focusing energy and attention on our greater vision is fundamental to a rich and fulfilling relationship. Your higher choice wins the day then rather than the problems and upsets.
If you are struggling or staleness is creeping in, check the degree of vision and purpose you are consciously connected to in your relationship. With a clear relationship vision it is far more easy to avoid getting caught in unresolved issues or unhelpful patterns of thinking, language and actions.