People often assume that because I’m a Relationship Therapist, I’m attached to people staying together. Absolutely I do love when that is the outcome. And mostly it is what emerges.
I am attached more so to the true connection between two people. Very often finding this quality of connection strengthens, fuels, unearths a loving and connection, that had become stressed or malnourished.
So that’s the first exploration when people come to me seeking – what is here? What have we got together? Help us find that love we know is here, or that we know we have had, or that we aren’t sure we’ve got, but we want to experience together.
This also often makes clear what choices are here to be made regarding a relationship.
Bear in mind that ⅔’s of conflict in relationship is said to be unresolvable. And that a lack of deep personal acceptance of ourselves or our life (dissatisfaction) is often projected on to our partner.
Intimacy also calls us to face ourselves and our vulnerability like virtually nothing else. We have lots of reasons to freak out and protect our hearts in intimate relationships – much as we love them and thrive in them. So we can be squirming for pretty deep addressable reasons too.
As I’m writing this, a song is playing in the cafe… “stuck in the middle with you. Trying to make some sense of it all. I can see it doesn’t make any sense at all… please, please …”.
If you are still wondering about how you can know whether a relationship is fundamentally challenged, this article has some useful information to read.
Looking for support? you know where I am.
p.s. If you aren’t in a relationship currently and are female contact me about the long weekend private retreat for empowering and celebrating women who are single xxx November 9-11, 2018